Pain Don't Hurt

Matt Feeney at Slate.com wrote this article in which he revels in the joys of Guilty Pleasure Cinema, movies that you love to watch despite the fact that you know that you couldn't justify your appreciation of them on an intellectual or artistic level. Here's how he describes them:

"They are studio movies that, though patently contrived, have stood the test of time (i.e., five or six years). Because these pleasures are guilty, I've gone to tiresome lengths not just to justify them to myself, but to define them as well.

First, a guilty pleasure should induce guilt. It must be neither overtly satirical nor so bad that it can be enjoyed ironically. Satire is its own alibi for a movie's trashy subject matter, and irony, on the other hand, is the viewer's. So, neither Heathers (satire) nor Showgirls (so bad it's good) qualifies as a guilty pleasure. Guilty pleasures tend to operate on the low end of high concept. They usually feature at least one narrative gimmick or ludicrous plot twist, and, at some point, they ditch narrative coherence for the sake of titillation.

Secondly, a guilty pleasure must be a pleasure. I enjoy them as much as I enjoy my favorite "serious" films. And because of their hyper-vivid production values, I can get pleasure from guilty pleasures in circumstances--fatigue, distraction, inebriation--where I can't really give Renoir or Bunuel chin-in-hand attention. This essay, in other words, is a qualified defense of studio filmmaking. Lush sets, beautiful people, exotic locations expensively shot... studio films offer the heightened reality that people have always sought in their trips to the movie house. Or so I tell myself."

His list was fairly good, including movies I enjoy in spite of myself like Devil's Advocate and Wild Things (the latter features Denise Richards in her prime: YOW!). However, I felt like I had to e-mail him and let him know that I felt like he'd left out one vital cinematic achievement. Here's my e-mail:

A respectable enough list, but you forgot to mention what is undoubtedly the greatest guilty pleasure film of all time: The 1989 Patrick Swayze opus Roadhouse. Not as pretensious as any of the films you mentioned, but much more enjoyable. I think it fits your criteria perfectly: I defy you to find one single second of intentional sarcasm or irony in the movie, and despite it's ridiculously self-serious tone it never spills over into 'so bad it's good' campiness (okay, maybe when Swayze says "Pain don't hurt"). No matter how many times the movie appears on cable, no matter how badly sliced-and-diced by the editors at TBS or USA, I will always make time to watch.

As for it's pleasure factor, what's not to love? The Western names (Dalton, Brad Wesley, Emmett, etc.), the uber-macho posturing and over-the-top mayhem, a complete lack of anything that even looks like law enforcement, the 'violence is the only way to resolve any dispute' ethos, and the presence of Sam Elliott, who can almost make a movie a guilty pleasure all on his own. Best ever.

Mr. Feeney was nice enough to write me back. Here's what he had to say:

I *love* Roadhouse. It's always on basic cable, but I can't bring myself to watch it there. The totally gratuitous nudity strikes me as somehow essential. Roadhouse contains one of my all time favorite lines. When the bar owner looking to hire Swayze says he heard he's the best, Swayze demurs: "Wade Garrett's the best." I say that line all the time, usually to myself. And, yes, the total absence of law enforcement. Good call. They just snuck that in and hoped we wouldn't notice. And why would we, with that space being taken up by Ben Gazzarra? I actually thought of Roadhouse, but to me it's more in the so-bad-it's-good category. I know I'm splitting hairs, but I guess that's what I'm paid for.
best,
Matt

I guess he has a point; It would be hard to argue that Road House is even "at the low end of high concept." Still, I think it's my own personal favorite Guilty Pleasure.

So if anyone out there is so inclined, let me know what your favorite Guilty Pleasure is. What movie would you be embarrassed to let the clerk at Blockbuster see you renting, but you will always stop whatever you are doing to watch it whenever you catch a glimpse of it on TNT?